Good Afternoon Toastmaster, fellow toastmasters, and guests.

Today, I want to talk about my life in the past 25 years, what makes the current me, what brings me here.

I was born in a small mountain village in Zhejiang province in China. It was beautiful except for the mining quarry and the dust. When I was 5, we moved to a nearby industrial town that was surrounded by factories.

I remember my parents worked on the first floor of our house building parts for machines day and night. And our bedrooms were on the second floor. During the night, I was too scared to stay alone on the second floor because I was always thinking there must be some unknown ghosts on the third floor. So I always went to the first floor and stayed up with my parents, helping them work. To me, it was a special enjoyable family time.

My earliest school days were terrible. I would often cry, like many of the other children. But things got better as I went through elementary school. I started to make new friends and play all kinds of games. I came to enjoy school life, enjoy playing with my classmates and friends, so much, that I didn’t want to miss a single day, even when I was sick. And my parents knew it. If I ever disobeyed them, they would keep me home from school as a punishment. That strategy worked really well. With little homework and even less pressure, I spent my time wild and carefree.

When I enrolled in the local middle school, I was still like a little kid in the first grade. Playing games was my main job. I became obsessed with online games. I asked my parents to buy me a personal computer. They said no, because I was too young and I would become addicted. But I needed the games!

On the night of a family reunion, I got my revenge. All my close relatives came to watch a fireworks performance. My parents wanted me to come with them and enjoy the family time. But I locked myself in the bedroom, and they couldn’t get me out the entire night. Eventually, they did buy me a computer. Then I spent all my spare time and money on online games. I was addicted. Grades? Girls? No. Only games.

I was lucky that I was admitted into one of the best high schools in our province. It recruited the top ranking students from hundreds of small towns and villages. I was the first person in my family to reach this status. But living on campus and surrounded by best of the best all the time started to change my personality.

After three years’ hard work, I was well prepared for the first turning point in my life – the college entrance examination. It’s called GaoKao in Chinese. Ten million students participate every year. It’s the ultimate gateway for social mobility in China.

Unfortunately, I collapsed under the pressure and failed. The score I got in GaoKao was the lowest one during the past three years. I felt depressed for a few days. But soon I relieved and told myself to use the four-year college time to make up this mistake.

And I made it. My college life was similar to my high school life. I spent all my time studying and my effort was paid off. I got offer from one of my dream graduate school in US.

Then I realized during past seven years, all I cared about was ranking and grades. I don’t know what I am really interested in. I don’t know whether I should pursue a Ph.D degree or not. I don’t know which area to focus on if I go to the industry.

That feeling became stronger and stronger especially when I started to work. In industry, there is no ranking or grades. I lost my motivation because I don’t know what my passion is. It’s just so hard for me to say I like something.

Back to my title: Excelsior, ever upward! This is the motto of the state of New York. I love it at the first sight. That’s my main belief in life so far. As one of my professor said, life is a journey to carve a best version of yourself. I really love the idea. I will keep exploring and never settle down. Stay hungry stay foolish!

Thanks!